Humans believe so many lies because we aren’t aware. We ignore the truth or we just don’t see the truth. When we are educated, we accumulate a lot of knowledge, and all that knowledge is just like a wall of fog that doesn’t allow us to perceive the truth, what really is.
Miguel Angel Ruiz
In a majority of marriage proposals parents seek a spouse that is religious and educated and proposals are accepted based on conformity of these two requirements. A few examples are mentioned below:
- Girl must be religious, beautiful, educated
- Applicant should be extremely religious, decent & educated.
- Groom should be religious; engineer / post Graduate
- Seeking a well educated, religious, fair complexion Bride
- Groom should be well educated
- Software professional at an MNC, seeking qualified religious bride
- Groom should be well qualified, B.E./MBA/MCA
- Girl should be religious, graduate, beautiful and homely
However, in a majority of relationships where both partners declared that they are religious and educated, the following has been observed:
- He has been verbally, emotionally and physically abusive.
- She has been suffering from her husband’s bad treatment, beatings, humiliation in front of her children, in front of strangers and always throwing her out of the house.
- I am pregnant and have serious difficulties in my marriage. I have been working to pay most of rent money, clothing expense, food, doctor bills, etc. My husband gives me some money for rent. My doctors have told me the pregnancy is “at-risk” due to my health. I have tried to quit work, but my husband disagrees. He becomes extremely angry with me at times.
- I have been married for 8 months and have faced many problems with my husband. He started beating me very badly and stopped me from going to my friends, relatives and even my parents.
- I have been married for 4 years and a half. My husband has an anger problem. He is extremely nervous and gets angry at everyone and everything.
- My husband beats me a lot…he never treats me in a good manner…he is always ignoring….He gets angry on me for silly things and then starts saying bad words and all of a sudden he gets so hyper that he starts beating me brutally.
If “Educated” meant to be the holder of a Degree or Diploma Certificate and “Religious” meant to be following a few religious obligations, it is time for parents to seek a clear definition of what the words “Educated” and “Religious” mean.
The following is a thesaurus for the words “Educated and “Religious” as defined in: http://www.thefreedictionary.com
- Cultured – marked by refinement in taste and manners; “cultivated speech”
- Lettered – highly educated; having extensive information or understanding
- Intellectual: Developed by or relying on the intellect rather than emotions or feelings; rational
- Learned: Possessing or demonstrating profound, often systematic knowledge; erudite.
- Informed: having much knowledge or education.
- Experienced: Skilled or knowledgeable as the result of active participation or practice.
- Polished – showing a high degree of refinement and the assurance that comes from wide social experience; “his polished manner”;
- Literary: versed in or acquainted with literature; well-read.
- Sophisticated – intellectually appealing.
- Refined – (used of persons and their behavior) cultivated and genteel.
- Cultivated – marked by refinement in taste and manners; “cultivated speech”;
- Enlightened – having knowledge and spiritual insight.
- Knowledgeable – thoroughly acquainted through study or experience.
- Civilized: Showing evidence of moral and intellectual advancement; humane, ethical, and reasonable.
- Tasteful: Having, showing, or being in keeping with good taste.
- Urbane Polite, refined, and often elegant in manner.
- Erudite: having or showing profound knowledge;
- Well-Bred: Of a good family; having a good pedigree.
- Devout: devoted to religion or to the fulfillment of religious obligations.
- Believing: To have firm faith, especially religious faith.
- Godly: Having great reverence for God; pious.
- Committed – bound or obligated, as under a pledge to a particular cause, action, or attitude
- Holy: Belonging to, derived from, or associated with a divine power; sacred.
- Practicing: Actively working in, engaged in, or observing, especially a particular profession or religion
- Faithful: Adhering firmly and devotedly, as to a person, cause, or idea; loyal.
- Pious: Having or exhibiting religious reverence; earnestly compliant in the observance of religion
If a spouse is able to conform to the above and then declare in their “Bio-Data” that they are “Educated” and “Religious”, a majority of the marital problems and social evils in the society would get eliminated and there would be more happiness and prosperity between the marital partners.
If you are seeking marriage or a spouse for your daughter/son, instead of being satisfied with mere academic qualifications and observance of a couple of religious obligations, it would be much better to ascertain if the would-be spouse is truly educated and religious. This verification can save your daughter/son from a miserable marital life.
Do you want your daughter or son to embark on a miserable marital journey?
About the Author (Author Profile)
I’m Fayaz Pasha from Bangalore, the Silicon Valley and Garden City of India. I’m a Certified Life Coach and an NLP Practitioner. I love reading, writing and convey my thoughts through Poetry. I would like to make my humble contribution to the Society through this blog towards detoxification of social evils particularly the dowry system.